SNIP!
by MissMagicalCat
Summary: Tugger's old flames are furious, and fed-up. They want revenge. My first fanfic, so please be nice. For Felixfeles' "Let's All Mutilate Tugger's Mane" competition, in the Scissors/Shears/Lawnmower category. Minor swearing. (Sorry, I'm awful at summaries). I DON"T OWN CATS!


_Dear Rumpleteazer,_

_ Do you remember, last month, when you said Tugger needed someone to put him in his place? Well, I agree completely and totally. I'm sending out this letter to every queen in the Jellicle Junkyard that Tugger has ever whored around with. It's time for us to teach him a lesson. There will be a meeting in my den, tonight at midnight. I hope you'll come!_

_~Etcetera_

Rumpleteazer read the signature three times before she assured herself it was genuine. Cettie? Revenge? Tugger? Woooow, what was wrong with the world today? She smirked, and walked out the door to her and Jerrie's den, deciding to get to Etcetera's house just a little early. She was 100% on board.

"Hey, hot stuff! What's up?" Cettie asked as the orange, black and white calico queen entered her den. Teaze held up her letter.

"I'm game. What's the plan?" She asked.

"The meeting isn't until tonight, muffin."

"I know, but I'm a professional schemist. I can work out the kinks your hyper little mind has spit out." Teaze said playfully

"Whatever, doll-face. So, I was thinking we. . . . ."

"So, my lovelies, I have a plan. Each and every one of you here has been played by Tugger, have you not?" Cettie spoke to a room full of queens. The cats at the meeting were: Bombalurina, Rumpleteazer, Tantomile, Electra, Victoria, Jemima, Cassandra, Exotica, and Demeter. Many of them nodded. Bomba said "Some more than others."

"Well, I've decided we shouldn't stand for it anymore! He needs to quit tormenting us! Not only do we need to stop him from being a player, we need to set an example for any other tom that wants to follow in his footsteps." Cettie grinned.

"Come on, how do you suppose we're going to do that?" Asked Victoria, snootily.

"Oh, we know just how to do it!" Said Teaze evilly.

"Very nice." Tant smirked, reading their minds.

"OH, TUGGER!" Etcetera called as she the main coon's name. She had regained her usual hyper attitude once she was sure she was going to get revenge from Tugger's stand-up just days before.

"Yes, my Cet?" He purred.

"I have something I want to-" BANG!

The Rum Tum Tugger woke up with a splitting headache, and to the sound of giggling queens. He looked around blearily, and spotted the weapon that must have knocked him out, a frying pan, laying nearby. He was still in his den, but was tied up in a chair. He looked up to see many of his old flames, one-night-stands, and a few members of his fan club in front of him. Together, they lifted his chair only a few inches of the ground, and managed to get him into the middle of the clearing. Alonzo, who was on patrol duty, looked at them curiously. Rumpleteazer produced a pair of old hair clippers from behind her.

"Tugger, dear," Began Etcetera, "Do you remember the other day, when you were supposed to take me out, but never showed up?" Tugger looked at her wearily, eyeing her as she took the clippers from Teazer.

"Well, this is my response." She grabbed a large lock of his mane, and quickly snipped it off, then dropped it in his lap. He howled with rage,

"ETCETERA! What in the Heaviside Layer do you think you're doing?!" Attracting the attention of a few Jellicles, who poked their heads out of their dens. Teazer now stepped forward, grabbing his mane.

"Do you remember the time you were _supposed _to take me to the Jellicle Ball?" Snip. Howl. "Or, maybe the one-night-stand?" Snip.

One by one, the queens stepped forward, cutting off uneven locks of Tugger's pride and joy. Soon, everyone was out of their dens, and only Bombalurina remained to cut Tugger's mane.

"Bomba, baby, come on! You know I love- NO!" He yelled as the curvy, red queen began to cut off his mane, savoring each moment of it. By the time she was done, Tugger's mane was ugly, and uneven.

"Good luck getting another date!" Laughed Cassandra, who had cut off seven pieces of Tugger's mane.

Then, the queens hooked arms and walked back towards Cettie's den, laughing, and leaving Tugger alone in the middle of the Junkyard, surrounded by flabbergasted cats.


End file.
